Sometimes I wonder...

Why do I have the best family on the face of the planet?

Why are my friends always there for me?

Why do I live in America where I have freedom?

Why can I eat three meals a day?

Why do I go to an amazing school with teachers who care about me?

Why do I have the opportunity to go to Italy in a few months?

Why do I get to see my best friend in 13 days?

Why did God bless me with SO freaking much?

Why does He continue to bless me even when I screw up beyond comprehension?

Why is He always there to pick me up when I fall?

Why have I been given life and breath?

I mean, c'mon, I don't deserve it.

I am so caught up in myself. All I think about is my own life. I am selfish.

I build myself up and convince myself that I am good enough. I am prideful.

I spend my time complaining about little things, like the fact that it hasn't snowed in awhile or that Physics homework that I should be doing right now...

So let's be real...

Why am I here?

Answer: God is good. God is gracious. God is loving.

Period. End of discussion. Case closed.

I am so overwhelmed by His work in my life, in my family, in my school, in my church, and even in my city. His blessings are immeasurable and He is working in this world. He cannot be stopped.

So what exactly was the point of this blog post?

Simply this:

God is good.

The end.

"And from his fullness we have all received grace upon grace." John 1:16

I have a story. A true story. A not-so-happy story. A story that includes God's grace, love, comfort, peace, and hope. It doesn't sound that unhappy, I know. But with the good, comes the bad. This story also includes, sorrow and mourning.

I'll start at the beginning.

My grandma is in her 70s but you would never know it because she is really 17 at heart. She is a hilarious, fun, gracious, loving, forgiving, and understanding woman. She has contagious laughter and it is impossible to not absolutely love her.

My grandma makes friends with everyone she meets. I often wonder how she keeps up with all the people in her life. Oh, did I mention that she has 21 grandchildren and 7 or 8 great grandchildren? She is one of those people that calls on a regular basis and writes cards to everyone for no particular reason. Everyone in her life is beyond blessed to know her. I know I am.

Last week, we received some hard news. News that would seemingly change our lives. Forever. Grandma was diagnosed with stage 4 cancer. The doctors found lumps in her limphnodes and after further testing, discovered that she has lung cancer. The only option being, chemo, which will only buy her a little bit of time.

With one granddaughter's wedding coming up and a whole lot of life still yet to be lived, the news, naturally, came as a pretty hard blow. Not only to her, but to everyone. Everyone in her life. Especially grandpa.

What the future holds for my sweet grandma is still unsure, but one thing remains certain: God's grace never fails.

There is a reason that this trial has struck my family.
There is a reason that God has put this into His plan.
There is still hope. For my grandma and for my family.
Only God can provide true peace and comfort.
Only he can perform miracles.

To say that I know the reason, or that I fully have hope, or that I have experienced that peace completely would be a lie.

To say that God will perform a miracle, would set myself up for defeat.

But there is always hope. There is always faith.

I have faith in my Jesus.

No matter what, one thing remains certain: His grace never fails.

I don't know what the future holds and I don't know what God's plan is. But I do know that His grace has showered over my family and that He has blessed us in more ways than I can count. His grace and His mercy are abundant in our lives and always will be. I have hope.

Whatever happens, whether God heals my grandma or not, one thing remains certain: His grace and His love never fail.

God is good.

 

Oh, taste and see that the LORD is good!

Blessed is the man who takes refuge in him!

Psalm 34:8

It's the little things

I love...

Buying things at the dollar store because EVERYTHING IS LITERALLY ONE DOLLAR.

Finding Youtube gems and getting inspiration for late night activities in a small town. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WygNjMSllLQ

Raiding friends' rooms while they are on vacation.

The ability to get two free tacos every day for one whole year!

Free slurpies on 7/11!

Staying up until 4:30 in the morning watching dance videos and talking about everything there is to talk about with best friends.

Homemade hash browns for breakfast/lunch. Half of them were incredibly crispy and the other half were gray and mushy.

Waterproof mascara and pink nail polish.

Frisbee in the park and a BBQ with great firends.

10 dollars an hour for babysitting some of the cutest kids on the planet.

Watching the original Tron with my dad on the new TV.

The special effects in Tron. They are equivilant to that of Pacman.

Completely sarcastic texting conversations with the best big brother ever.

Jumping in the river as many times as possible.

A phone call from my sister from the airport before she left for her excursion through Europe.

Papa Dee who lets me borrow his car whenever I need it.

Crafts and room decorating with my amazing mama.

StumbleUpon.

Cheez-its and Pepsi, while watching Supersize Me. Oh, the irony.

I love...summer time.

It's the little things. It's the little things that keep me going. The little things that God has blessed me with.

I have the best life. You know why? Because I have the best parents. I have the best siblings. I have the best friends. I have the best family. Most importantly, I have JESUS.

Tonight, as I am laying in bed reflecting on all that I have been given, I am truly thankful. I am thankful for the little things, as well as the big things. I am thankful that I know Jesus. I am aware that I don't deserve any of the blessings I recieve, but I am thankful for grace. I am thankful for God's never-ending, all-consuming, unconditional love for me.

Though I don't deserve it, I am thankful for my life.

Maybe you've had a hard day, or maybe a hard week or month...maybe you've had a hard year. Even if that's the case, take a second and stop. Stop and think about all you've been given. Be grateful that you 're alive. Thank God for your life and don't waste it. Live it to the fullest, spread the gospel, and glorify Jesus.

Be thankful. Be blessed.

Enter his gates with thanksgiving,
and his courts with praise!
Give thanks to him; bless his name!
-Psalms 100:4

Determined

Hypocricy.

How often do we hear that word and just think of the Pharisees in the Bible and assume that we are never hypocritical?

Conviction.

How often do we hear that word and cringe because no one likes to be shown when they sin?

Convicted of hypocricy.

Well, those two words together...they make me cringe. That's for sure.

I like to give advice.

I'm pretty good at it..if I do say so myself.

Sometimes I think about the advice I give and wonder if I practice what I preach.

"Pray and seek the Lord's counsil. Be thankful through trials. Seek the will of God in all things."

Those are great words, but how often do we actually do that when we tell others to do? How often do we take our own advice?

Sometimes I wonder if I follow through on the encouragement I give.

"I'm praying for you!"

How often do you say that? ....And then not follow through.

That saying, "I'm praying for you", is thrown around much too flipantly. When you make such a serious promise like that, how often do you actually do it? Maybe it's just me, but I struggle with that. More often than not, I pray for my friends when I tell them I do..but sometimes, I forget. I'm not intentional about keeping my promise.

I have a friend. She is 16-years-old in reality, 6-years-old at heart, and 60-years-old in wisdom and knowlege.

She is the most intentional pray-er that I think I have ever met. She tells me on a regular basis that she is praying for me and she is one of those people that you just know she means it. She prays for the randomest people. All the time. She prays for the randomest things. All the time. She has pure love and joy in her heart for everyone she meets. If you are not blessed by her when you meet her, than you should check your pulse.

She's been through a lot of health issues in her 16 years of life. Recently she was diagnosed with a serious illness having to do with her blood circulation and so on. I don't understand it at all so I won't bother explaining it. But my point is that even through everything she has been through, she finds joy. She finds thankfullness. She finds a way to be the most encouraging person I have ever met. She has the gift of encouragement. I am convinced of it.

She truly practices what she preaches and she keeps promises like, "I'm praying for you."

Now my friend, Emily is her beautiful name, has the legal middle name of Nicole. But it wasn't long before her parents realized that this was not the right name. She is so full of joy that her parents knew that her middle name should be Joy. She is joyful always. Through it all. Emily Joy.

I want to learn from her.

I want to learn to be peaceful through anything.

I am convicted.

I am determined to pray more.

I am determined to take my own advice.

I am determined to seek the Lord through it all.

"Rejoice in the Lord always; again I will say, Rejoice." Philippians 4:4

Follow Emily on what she calls her "Journey to joy". Be encouraged. Be thankful.
www.becauseyoushine.wordpress.com

Time

It has been quite some time since I have blogged. A good long while. With that in mind, I decided to blog about...time.

Let me, first, take a small rabbit-trail. Last Sunday I woke up with unbearable pain in my stomach. I spent all day in bed keeled over in pain. That night I started feeling better and had high hopes of being able to go to school in the morning. 3am rolled around and I was jolted awake by the same pain consuming my tummy. I was so disappointed and immediately overcome by stress. Let me tell you why.

Pre-calculus is the devil. Now a close runner-up to this position is Chemistry. Both, are in my life this year and both are driving me to an early grave. I have final tests on both coming up. On top of the hours I spend trying to understand these evil subjects I also have another academic stress. At my school, the juniors and seniors choose controversial thesis statements at the end of the year and write and deliver 3000 word papers on them. My thesis was due today.

So as much as I would like to say that I didn't want to miss school because I love it so much...it was really because I had too much to do and couldn't aford to miss school.

I was panicing about missing one day and little did I know that my pain would not cease. After a doctor's appointment, getting my blood drawn, drinking a chalking watery substance that tasted like death 5 times, then a CT scan...we determined that I had to go into emergency surgery to have my appendix removed.

After surgery, I laid in the hospital bed in a drugged daze. The doctor came in to check on me and I asked him when I could return to school. He replied, "Do you have any big projects you need to get back to?" I quickly returned with a resounding, "YES!"

Nonetheless, I have been out of school all week.

The following were my thoughts as I laid in bed at home unable to accomplish any homework. "Great. This came at the worst time. I have Pre-calc homework, Chemistry homework, thesis work to do, and Kung Fu Panda 2 came out YESTERDAY and I still haven't seen it."

Lately I've noticed that sometimes things happen at what seems to be the wrong time. Nothing ever happens when I want it to and nothing ever goes exactly according to my plan.

I hate time.

I hate plans.

I hate it when time interferes with my plans.

The more I think about those statements, the more selfish I seem. Since when are my plans the most important thing? Why does everything have to revolve around my time? Who died and made me the center of everything?

Through these times when nothing seems to go my way, I have realized two things. First, God's timing is perfect. And second, my plan is not God's plan.

God knows what He is doing. He is the ultimate planner. He is the author and creator of all of creation. The entire plan of redemption is in His hands. Knowing that, why would I not trust in His timing? Why would I not trust in His perfect plan?

With God, all thngs will work out. He is in control and He holds everything together.

So even though I have to make up a little bit of homework and I didn't see the sequal to one of the best Pixar movies ever made exactly when I wanted to, I will still get it all done by the grace of God. I will get it done not in my timing, not in my plan, and not by my own power, but in His perfect timing, in His incredible plan, and by His never-ending power and grace in my life.

Thank you, Jesus, that it is not all left up to me. Thank you for planning my life before I was born and timing out every moment flawlessly before it happens.

Your timing is perfect.

My plan is not Your plan.


But they do not know
the thoughts of the LORD;
they do not understand his plan,
that he has gathered them as sheaves to the threshing floor.
-Micah 4:12
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                        

Death

The other day in my Doctrine class, a kid asked our teacher if he was afraid to die. Without hesitation he said, "No. Well actualy I take that back. Am I afraid to die? Maybe a little. Am I afraid of death? Absolutely not."

Death is a strange topic. Everybody has to go through it. There is no way around it. It's a strange thing to think about. It's hard to comprehend. And frankly, I don't really want to think about, let alone comprehend it. Most people don't. Which is why, the topic gets avoided all too often.

Death.

Words that come to my mind when I think of death:
Eery.
Creepy.
Scary.
Halloween.
Pain.
Sorrow.
Hell.

Why is that? Why do such dark, horrible thoughts come to my mind? Maybe it's because dying is not a very friendly thought. Not many people are excited to go through the process of dying.

Personally, I have probably the lowest pain tolerance of anyone you know. Literally. I could drop a paperclip on my toe and I would flinch.  I don't take pain well. So, am I afraid to die? HECK YES I AM! I just hope that I die in my sleep of old age.

But when you think about it, dying and death are two very different things. Everyone is afraid of dying whether they want to admit it or not. But death? Death doesn't have to be a frightening thing.

Have you ever heard people use this "evangelism" technique?: Walk up to a non-believer and say, "Hey do you know where you're going when you die?" And when they say no fire back with, "Well I do, and if you don't believe in God then it's not gonna be a pretty place!" In my opinion that is not a great way to share the gospel.

HOWEVER, as Christians, sometimes we need to be asked that question. Do you know where you're going after you die? What's gonna happen to you after death? Where will you spend eternity?

Are you ready to die? Have you lived your life to the fullest? And I don't mean, "Have you gone skydiving at least 3 times and completed everything on your bucket list?" I mean, "Have you served, honored, and glorified God to the best of your ability in everything? Have you been on mission for the Gospel of Jesus Christ? Have you been a shining light for Jesus? Have you made an impact on this world through your love for God and His love for you?"

These are hard questions to answer. But think about it. If you died tomorrow would you hear God say to you, "Well done, good and faithful servant." ? Or would He say, "Depart from me, I do not know you." ?

We need to be in a place in our walk with God, where we can say without a shadow of a doubt, in full confidence that we are not afraid of death because we will spend eternity in paradise with our Father in Heaven.

We need to live our Christian lives like we will die tomorrow.

We need to serve God in all we do.

Death is not an eery thing. It's not scary or creepy. As long as our lives have been committed to our Savior.

It's a hard thing to grasp. It's hard to think about it. It's not always easy or fun to think about. But today, I am resolving to have the mindset of my Doctrine teacher. Am I afraid to die? Maybe a little. Am I afraid of death? Absolutely not.

"Yes, and I will rejoice, ¹⁹for I know that through your prayers and the help of the Spirit of Jesus Christ this will turn out for my deliverance, ²⁰as it is my eager expectation and hope that I will not be at all ashamed, but that with full courage now as always Christ will be honored in my body, whether by life or by death. ²¹For to me to live is Christ, and to die is gain. ²²If I am to live in the flesh, that means fruitful labor for me. Yet which I shall choose I cannot tell. ²³ I am hard pressed between the two. My desire is to depart and be with Christ, for that is far better. ²⁴But to remain in the flesh is more necessary on your account. ²⁵ Convinced of this, I know that I will remain and continue with you all, for your progress and joy in the faith, ²⁶so that in me you may have ample cause to glory in Christ Jesus, because of my coming to you again."
Philippians 1:21-26

Today

I saw a commercial the other day advertizing...well, to be honest, I don't remember what it was advertizing. But I do remember what it was about.

There was a phrase in it that really caught my attention: "What if we celebrated every new day like we do the new year?" Then it showed several people at a variety of different dates and places throwing confetti and blowing noise makers when the clock stroked midnight.

Apparently the point of this commercial didn't mean much to me or I would remember what it actually was. But the part that I do remember was very striking to me.

What if we toasted with champaign, gave a new day's kiss, blew noise makers, and screamed "Happy New Day!" every night? What if we threw major parties every night just to bring in the new day? What if we got excited for every new day, not knowing for sure what it would hold? What if instead of new year's resolutions, we made new day's resolutions? What if we treated every new day like it was a gift?

What if every new day IS a gift?

You know that feeling of "December 31st is here again. Time to bring in the new year by limiting my facebook time and losing 25 pounds by March."

What if we changed that feeling to "Tomorrow is a new day. I'm going to celebrate by giving God the glory, thanking him for His grace, and resolving to read my Bible today."?

Bringing in the new year is, I think, one of the most fun traditions that our society has. This year we hosted a party at my house, played ping pong, ate more food than our stomachs could handle, and when midnight rolled around we blew noise makers and screamed at the top of our lungs for a solid 6 minutes. If that is not an awesome tradition, than I don't know what is.

New Year's is fun, but so often we forget about New Day's.

We forget that every day is a gift.

We forget that we do not deserve to be living on this earth in luxury.

We forget that God has gifted each and every day to us out of His loving kindness, grace, and mercy.

I'm not saying that we need to stay up until twelve every night and scream for 6 minutes straight, but I am saying that we should not take our lives for granted. We should not merely go through the motions of day-to-day life and not even stop to smell the roses. Not even stop to have some fun. Not even stop to pray. To thank God for what He has done for and given us. To thank Him for today. Not even stop to feel the all-comsuming love of Jesus Christ in our lives. Not even stop to acknowlege Him.

So as you bring in the New Year and set impossible goals for yourself, remember to also, bring in the New Day and set more achievable ones for today.

Trust in the Lord always. He know what today holds. He knows what 2011 holds.

"We don't know what 2011 holds.
But we know Who holds 2011."
-Josh McPherson

"I don't wanna go through the motions
I don't wanna go one more day
without Your all consuming passion inside of me
I don't wanna spend my whole life asking,
"What if I had given everything,
instead of going through the motions?"
-Matthew West

"The steadfast love of the LORD never ceases;
   his mercies never come to an end;
they are new every morning;
    great is your faithfulness."
-Lamentations 3:22,23